I wish that I didn’t feel so sick
that I wasn’t awake at 3:53 am worrying about my blood
that I didn’t fear going to the hospital as much as I fear being ill
that I could sleep soundly with the knowledge I’ll be taken care of
I wish that I could trust doctors.
that when I looked into their eyes I saw stars instead of dollar signs
that their pockets weren’t full of fancy, pharmaceutical pens
that their ears weren’t whispered in by vultures
that their minds weren’t infiltrated by parasites
that when they put a pill on my tongue I tasted a cure, not enslavement
I wish that people didn’t profit on zombies
that an intravenous drip wasn’t a chain to debt
that my life mattered more than money
that my mother’s soul mattered more than pens
I wish death were not a business.
I wish I didn’t even have to wish for this.